July 31, 2004
Topic: Coping With Fibromyalgia I first wanted to share a poem I found on the FibroSplash on-line support group. Although it is untitled, I believe many of us know where Jaki is coming from. Next I have included "Suggested Flare-Up Coping Strategies for Chronic Pain" from the National Chronic Pain Outreach Association, and "Positive Thoughts For Coping". 
Untitled by Jaki French It never fades, it never goes away, always there.
You just can't see it for looking but it's in my constant everyday.
You think I am lazy or fake, you think I smile and am okay,
But the reality is - I need to get on with life, but it hasn't gone away.
I am torn between trying to tell you and trying to look alright.
Because if I admit it's so bad, I have to admit to myself that I can't.
Please dont think I am hiding from you,
Don't think I am lying or trying to pull away,
If I don't make it, or can't make it to everything we do.
Maybe it's because I am not okay.
You think sick is having a cold or flu,
But if sick is with you in everything you do?
A sore back lays you up for a week, but I have no choice.
It's either smile or give in and I have to keep going.
I don't want to sound negative,
But there is just so much to me that you can't see.
You think you know me and what it is like but you can't know,
And you can't explain it and I know that is harder than all.
I need to be believed, to know that you know I am not faking,
To know that you know how heartbreaking it is for me to struggle through.
And so just for one second imagine,
What it might be like to be normal - like you.
Suggested Flare-Up Coping Strategies for Chronic Pain
Pain can be one of the overwhelming conditions of fibromyalgia. When the pain flares-up, sometimes there is no way to make it go away. But there are some simple things to do to try to cope with that pain better. Here are some simple ideas from the National Chronic Pain Outreach Association: Relax - listen to a relaxation tape, or imagine a pleasant scene.
Do a distracting activity - reading, handiwork, etc.
Remind yourself that it's temporary and will pass.
Apply moist heat or ice.
Humor.
Get involved in conversation.
Listen to music.
Do deep breathing or meditation.
Avoid stressful situations if possible.
Reduce tension by whatever means (even yelling or crying).
Notice the control you do have (in whatever areas of your life).
Take a relaxing shower or bath.
Spend time in a very quiet room.
Use disassociation - become an observer of your pain rather than feeling like a participant.
Use visual imagery to transform your pain into something different - a shape or color, for example.
Focus your attention on a part of your body which has a different sensation.
Ask for support from others!
Adjust your activity level gradually. Increase up time toward normal activity level over 3-4 days.
Positive Thoughts for Coping
We all have heard people admonish, "You need to have a positive attitude". But when you are feeling bad that is not what you want to hear. But the advice is not really that far off the mark. Having a positive attitude does help to cope with fibromyalgia. Here are a few statements of affirmation to consider: I am confident of my ability to deal with my health and live a good life.
Things are getting better.
I am making progress in helping myself to feel better.
Today I can do what I need to do for recovery.
I can treat myself gently and with the special care I would give a close friend.
I am learning what I need to do to take care of my body.
I focus on positive actions I can take to advocate for myself.
I look for the good this day can bring.
I go with the flow of each new day, accepting what I can learn from it.
I seek out the positive support I need to live with my disorder.
I let go of any muscle tension or problems over which I have no control.
I live with positive expectancy: Each day I expect to feel better and more relaxed.
I counter each stress with techniques I know to balance out the negative stress.
I can surmount any problem that occurs today with calm problem-solving skills.
I can look for the resources I need to manage any problems.
I maintain slow and easy breathing, bringing fresh oxygen to my muscles.
I keep my muscles loose and relaxed throughout the day.
I take time during the day to relax and breathe to refresh my muscles.
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